So Painful..

Under the bellowing trees is a sacred keep

The mournful ecstacy tastes like glimmer of the truth

It's the silence echoing through the mystical whim

Our necks bowing as a gesture to the night

The smell of the putrid soil wakes us up from dreams

It's painful to be here, so painful..

Across the seas lies my heart, dreaming..

I feel it beat, tsunami hits the shore, I curse a name

The name that stole my soul from me..

I try to shout for help with no response

Just an angel looking down on me with a shining smile

"Can one not fall in love with an angel?" I inquire

A childish hope of winning the lottery amongst millions to follow

The hope lets go of my neck, I see the soil.. the smell

It's painful to be here, so painful...

Every heart shines towards the dead cold sea

The porcelain of the sky trembles with the chill breeze

A lucid dream right by the shore, where we let go ourselves

Somewhere out there, our soul lives in a shining star

At least that's what we always hoped for, now it's too late

We sold our soul for the game of love; a cheap trade..

It's giving up everything, knowing you'll loose

"Keep your hopes high!".. well, that's a lie

I don't feel anthing now, in this dark corner, I lay with blank gaze

It's painful to be here, so painful...

Mermaids rise from the surface of the glitter

Unspoken words cling to the air while we are perturbed from listening

It's been days and months, yet we stand still, gloss of the day lost

Now darkness avails it's true face that murdered millions

Has no mercy, no shame, nothing, just a smile

That's what killed us this very day; no one ever cared

We were toys, and we kept hoping, and now that the hope is gone

We are left alone, bullied in this orphanage

It's painful to be here, so painful...

Emotive

Cure the wounds, touch them and feel my heart beating

Doing its best to patch them up, quick and painless

Time was in the bottle that sits there, empty

I got a full shot just to hope that it will take the pain away

But I know once I regain full conciousness, it will hurt more than before..

Synapses erode with the screeches travelling back and forth

The pain is never central, it's like a communal mourning central

All systems start to fall on their knees, pleading for hope

I give them your smile, allright, and they silence for a while

Only to come back asking for more, this time your miss giving the pain

All the streams of passion has been stored in a vase

I sometimes give you a bit of a taste, but I want to soak you with it

I want to feel the freedom and joy of sharing it with you

Instead of hiding it like a 5 year old's treasure

A fragile existence of minutes in an eternal casket..

Body

On a perfect night, we feel the cosmos spinning in us

It's a tone of tangerine, a bit wild and luring

A thematic promise that goes beyond our imagination..

Lying by the shadows of the moon, thoughts are a bland pool of curiosities

We venture into the kingdom of our wills, hlding onto them one by one

And we never feel like leaving this place ever again..

This is the place that I am with you in my dreams,

The seasparkles singing our song as we are filled by the scene

It's our hands that do the talking, the silence is our love's aid..

Too deep in the pond, I see myself getting lost in an exitless maze

Consistent steps to keep up with the madness

It is the sublevel of our tolerable insanity reflected onto the world..

We collide sometimes, two or more, become many, and rule all together

These collisions are what makes us the way we are, accepted or not

It's our sweet romantic insanities that drive us to the edge..

The Point

You know that point where nothing means anything to you anymore

When you start to search excitement somewhere other than your life

Your eyes hurt from dryness, tears are no more a toy of your pains

Sleep is unnecessary and a time wasting process, until you pass out

Drinking just to forget the past and numb your senses,

Throw up to add excitement to your daily life and experience something new

Love to get the attention you've always wanted,

But never loved back because you're too lazy to try to take a step

Embrace the cold to shiver, a thrill that you haven't sensed for so long

Freeze to hope that it will be your ticket out of here

Smile because that's what you want people to believe

Smile because that's what you believe..

Forget how to smile because it doesn't make sense anymore

Just stare because every blink hurts the dry surface of your eye

Stop caring about time because it's always coming back to that same point?

Detour

Somewhere along the highway, I open the door and jump off.. That car becomes an object of the past, dissolves in the horizon..

I tumble, roll, bounce.. It's an uncalculated physics equation that simply equals to pain..

The cement.. it is not forgiving.. It's warm, like an embrace though..

Then it burns.. the cement burns.. the scars..

They are my palette as I draw the guidelines of my self-submitted agony..

I stand high.. No crossroads to detour from the past or the future..

I sit down.. No hope to pick me up and drive me away..

I was trapped here because I wanted to in the first place..

But I didn't know then, that the sun was this poignant..

I was tricked by the soothing air in the car..

The rays were blocked by my shattered glass..

Here I was, with nothing to hold onto but my warm scars..

Past Resurrection

Randomly tracing through what the memory has stacked on that filthy corner of my mind

It's a corner hat I don't really enjo being around.. It's just that, you know...

Just all those stuff that I miss so deeply now, and can't get back

All the loves and feelings and events that are now stolen by the past..

Their resurrection os my death..

Wondering until when I can bear he sweet taste of the stack pulling me towards it..

It's unbearably not to be able to be a part of your self. even thoug it gives you umtimate pain

It's all those precious days you've spent, and all the efforts for the beloved one

Now you are trying to establish your life with that? Pure bullshit

You will find yourslef crumbling down soon, all the realizations of the past wil strike you and..

..that's where I don't know where I am heading.

I tried every direction; east, west. north, south... Nothimg helped

I didn't realize I was pulled towards an endless pit..

I knew it was my end.. I could feel it burning inside me, all those memories..