Comatosis

And then I realize that this is not temporary..
I realize that it is here to stay..
That's when I give up my will to stay here anymore..
That's when I want to run away..
Wherever the wind might take and drop me..

I realize that it will follow me..
I know that it is a permanent spot on my heart..
I take my knife out to cut it out..
I know that I will fail in the end..
I drop it, I drop myself..
I feel dropped inside, alone, on the rainy pavement..
I contribute to the flood passing over me..
I feel emotions rushing like a wild herd of bisons..
I feel beaten..
I say, thanks for the massage..
I faint into the faint lit dreams..
I drown in my olden memories..